This is EVERYTHING!!!

Bleu Nature 10″ Nilleq Burnt Wood Cube – Barneys.com – $2,075.00

I never realized just how deep an effect the creative arts had on me until my daughter and I took a stroll up to the 9th Floor of Barneys New York, before going out for my birthday dinner.

I enjoyed looking at the clothing on the lower floors, despite knowing that most of the items were a bit out of my price range.  Barneys provides the perfect eye candy to feed my art obsession and yarn addiction. Having always gravitated towards the intricate well-designed garments and spectacular knitwear on the lower floors, I had never before entertained venturing up to the 9th-floor Housewares section.

Housewares was a new experience for me. Displayed were random knickknacks and Home Décor items, catering to the quintessential Barney’s customer; home of the tastemakers of the world.

Dexter Does Plates? 

We looked around at the lacquered, hand-painted serving trays and meticulously designed bookends and vases. My daughter was captivated and mesmerized by a set of red paint-splattered dishes that reminded her of the blood-splatter analyst/serial killer on the TV show “Dexter”, whom she, at one time, referred to as her husband.

I was never able to keep up with these temporary celebrity husbands, as there were too many and ranged from Mark Wahlberg, to Miguel Cotto, to Seth Rogan. I’m still slightly confused, but not everyone is easy to figure out. How I loved seeing her eyes light up as she pulled out her phone to take photos. We have similar visual tastes, so I could see why she found seemingly blood-splattered plates visually appetizing. We both love Jackson Pollock and appreciate the intensity of his expression—so why not.

I Can’t With This! 

We looked around at other dishware and she fantasized about the things that she would have when she had her own apartment. While she was photographing serving trays and utensils, I wandered into the section with coffee tables, pillows, and all manner of items for the well-decorated living room. I turned and was stopped cold. My jaw dropped and I couldn’t control my immediate response. I blurted out, “Oh my God! Really?!!! Really??!!! I can’t with this.” My daughter immediately asked, what happened.  All I could say was, “I can’t with this. Really??!” I paced around in circles. “Dead!!! I’m on the floor right now.” The other customers started to look uncomfortable. They weren’t sure what was wrong with me, and most decided against getting close enough to find out.

I cupped my face in my hands and shook my head in total awe and bewilderment. My daughter came over to see what was wrong and all I could do was point and say “I can’t.” I pointed to the entrancing burned wood tree stump, encased in what appeared to be glass. It was made by a company called Bleu Nature and was labeled as a side table. A piece like this should not be labeled as anything other than pure art.

 

There should have been a sign pointing to it saying, “This is EVERYTHING!!!” It was astounding and I was blown away. A brave woman had begun moving closer to me to see why I was holding my head, pacing and gesticulating. That’s when my daughter was finally close enough to see exactly what I saw. She immediately responded with the same fervor that I had. “Oh my God!!” she said, “Is this real? Seriously??? I just can’t!” I felt my eyes well up. I whispered in an almost ghostlike voice. My eyes, I imagined, looked like those little doll-faced children in the Manga books.

“It’s charred wood, encased in glass.”

She paced around in circles just as I had. It was quite funny seeing her respond so similarly. My baby; my daughter, apple—tree—Newton. Unfortunately, we both frightened the approaching woman away. The salesman glanced over—nonchalantly, and then looked away. I think the woman thought we were angry. The only thing we possibly could have been angry about was the price.

It was over $2,000. (The 10” one I was eyeing was $2,075, and there was also an 11” one for $3,265.) But that’s how much it should be. You can’t put a price on sheer genius. I really wanted it. I wanted to pick it up and hug it and carry it out of the store in a hand-knit, baby blue cashmere blanket.

I started taking photos. I love to photograph the things that I find beautiful. (One day Prince. One day you won’t be looking, and I will catch you… Providing my soul allows me to do something I know would not be appreciated.)
 But I digress.

Unfortunately, the photos I took were not doing this masterpiece justice. I don’t know if it was the lighting or the poor-quality iPhone camera. For some reason, I remember the quality of the iPhone photos being a lot better before the last software upgrade. Anyway, it was making me angry that I could not get a good photo of this beautiful treasure. Then I realize, all I had to do was Google Barneys and glass-encased wood table. I found the perfect photo and was happy that this memory would not be taken from me.

I love you Barneys. I love you Bleu Nature (Frank Lefebvre). I love you little acrylic glass-encased charred driftwood table. I’m going to knit you a sweater and one day I will take you home.
Can you take a Xanax for Art high? 

Advertisement